Remember, back in the sixties, when Howard Hughes bought up thousands of acres of Nevada desert...and half of Las Vegas? Well, you might also remember that he did that because he was convinced California was going to undergo a massive earthquake, tumbling the state into the Pacific Ocean, and he'd be sitting pretty with ocean front land in Nevada. The problem with Howard's theory is that it wasn't based on science...it was just Howard's little crapshoot that didn't pan out.
Well, this morning I read a report that the oceans are rising faster than expected. And I gotta feel good about that because I'm in the perfect place to profit from it. And, unlike Howard, I have all those climate change scientists (funded by our government masters who insist it's a fact)...so how can I go wrong?
SO...here I sit in Phoenix and our government masters are saying the Gulf of Mexico will be rising and shooting north, right to where I am in Phoenix...so I'm going to own some 13,000 square feet of ocean front property! Eat your heart out Los Angeles and San Diego! When you're swimming with the fishes I'm gonna be renting out one of my two houses to surfer dudes who survived that gigantic climate change "wave of the century!"